Friday, October 23, 2015

object-choice in psychic bisexuality

In general, I can say that subject egoists and object egoists are usually attracted to one another as are subject altruists and object altruists.

However, in pathology, you can often see some cross-fertilization between the two poles.

For example, you can see a female object egoist who has been jilted by male subject egoists become interested in a male object altruist because she is the dominant one in the relationship. The object altruist also experiences her anger as 'loss of love' and takes her criticisms of his inadequacies because he feels them to be true himself.

A subject egoist, in pathology, will also be interested in a subject altruist who is going to imitate his views or idealizes him as powerful even though he might not have any external success or recognition. This "mirroring" she can give him in the object drive relation makes up for the lack in the ego drive relation. She, like the OA, experiences his anger as loss of love which she expects in pathology and is ready to take on the blame for things that go wrong in his life. As I've mentioned in a previous post, the further steps of physical abuse aren't "natural" echoistic behavior. That kind of masochism involves things like an identification with the castrated maternal imago in order for it to be something acceptable or something she will be in denial about as a problem.

There are many combinations in sexual relationships, but I thought that I'd just point out that in health, it seems like egoist is attracted to egoist and altruist to altruist...

I should also mention that along with the OE's problems with sexual difference and wanting to be dominant with an OA, that I've worked with many OAs who would like to be "mannies" or "house husbands" with the woman working. There is a strong sense of "womb envy" or not wanting to compete and exhaustion of the will in them...

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